So there is progress. The results after the reset and firmware reload can be seen from 7pm last night. This morning I remembered I had an EdgerouterX in a drawer that I had tried to use but was too complicated for a simpleton like me. Firing it up and connecting the BT line gave me the following results, with the ERX results starting at 11.30am.
https://www.thinkbroadband.com/broadband/monitoring/...
So yes, 100% it's the Draytek, but the question is why and what am I doing to make it perform so badly IF they arent throttling ICMP. As I think I said, you can use the QoS functionality to set ICMP to Class1, which I tried with no difference. I have also excluded it from being a cable issue given the results on my laptop and the ERX.
I will ask again on the Draytek forum and post anything interesting here.